My life as an addict

    I would like to tell you what it is like to be an addict.  I have been thinking about this for some time and I felt that I should write about it.  bluey and I have been watching the show Elementary which is a new take of the Sherlock Holmes stories.  It is not the BBC show Sherlock but it is a very good show to watch.  The first thing we learn about Sherlock is that he just got out of rehab for doing hard drugs and Watson has been hired by his father to be his sober companion.  One of the plot points in the show is that Watson is trying to keep Sherlock from going back into addiction.  I am talking about the show because I like how they show Sherlock trying to beat his addiction and the work that it takes for him to get over it. It is the great Sherlock Holmes (who is not a real person, I know) and what he has to go through to be able to live life in a mostly normal way, for him at least.
   We hear from people all the time that they are addicted to something.  They are doing it all the time or they just really love it and that is the only thing that they will buy in a way.  Well that is not really addiction, it is the start.  What it means to be addicted to something is that something is controlling your life.  You are thinking about it almost all of the time.  It will come into your thoughts with just the littlest of hints, ideas, anything.  You dream about it both at night and in the day.  When you do give into it, it is the greatest thing in your life at that time.  That is all you are thinking about then, that is all you want to do.  Having other things to do does not matter, you will get to them later.  Well that later can end up being 1 or 2 hours away, heck it can even be 5 or 6 hours away for all you care, at that point you just want to fill that desire.  Only the desire never goes away, yes it might lessen for a time but it will always come back and you will need to fulfill it again and it is down hill again for you.  You might even want to stop and you might even try a few times but it is always in the back of your head and you will always have thoughts about it.  Addiction is the hardest thing to runaway from, it controls your life.  I say this because as I said I am an addict and will always be one.
    There is a reason why we are told by the Church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints) that we need to stay away from addictive behaviors.  Some of them are for health reasons but not all things can be bad for your health.  Smoking, drinking, drugs (legal or illegal), pornography (of any kind), gaming, caffeine, gambling,  anything that can take control of your life.  Yes I did say gaming but when I do I am meaning electronic gaming, computer or system.  It can be addictive and it can be bad for your.  So when something takes away your ability to choose with a clear head it is not good for you, no matter how good it is that 90% of the time.  When it has gotten to that point you need to become sober from it and change your life.  If you don't you might not end up dead but you really won't be living either.  You don't have a life you are just there going through the motions and all that matters is when you will be able to fulfill the desire.  THAT IS NOT LIVING! I know because I am trying to live not just be there going through the motions.  When you live life is much better.

-Smals

Larry Correia, a fun man to read

       I put that title to see if this page would more page views from Google.  But I am going to talk about a little about the man.  I am a lover of good books and Larry Correia writes good books.  He also knows how debate with people and is not scared to let people know what he thinks.  His blog  http://monsterhunternation.com/ is where he posts his thoughts on what people are saying and just what he is thinking.  I really love reading what he writes about.  Just to let you know, he does not hold back when someone is being dumb and not thinking about what they are saying.  He will point it out to them and let them know that they are not being the smartest person at that time.  My brother pointed out that Larry when he gets that way takes the mood of the rant and puts it in the frame of mind that it will end up in the end and starts with that.  So when he writes it comes out as a bare knuckle fist fight and last man standing wins type of way.  Granted I may not always agree with him but that is okay because that is what debate  is for.  So not that is out of the way lets see how many people will look at this page with Larry Correia as the title.
       Blogs are about the people so this is about me, Smals.  It has been some time since I have writen on Smals Thoughts but will I was never very good at writing in a journal so what can you expect with a journal that is online and everyone can see.  But life has been moving along.  Last month school got out and I started to look for a job for the summer. I was hoping to get a job with the state again and do grounds crew and at first I was not able to get on because the crew was full.  I did get on by the middle of the month and I have working for the state again and getting lots of sun.  Thinking of good book bluey and I have been listening to the Wheel of Time series and have been loving all of them so far.  We started them about 2 month and today we just started book 11.  Now if you know anything about WoT they are not small book and well that is really all we have been listening to.  They are great book and the story is amazing.  So I would say to people if you have not read the books you should.  This is not a very long blog post but I am just getting back into it so we shall see how it comes along.  Well have a great time reading a good book and please don't make fools of yourself but if you do send it to Larry so he can mock you in a very well written way.

-Smals

Living Life

A lot has happened since May the 4th, granted has only been 14 days since then but wow a lot can happen in 14 days.  School has ended for the semester, we moved out of our apartment, and I started a new job. 
So school ending.  In a way it has for the USU side.  Jess and I had decided that we don't need to be in Logan any more for school.  Those thoughts came from a few different thoughts.  I will say one of them, I did not have a job for 8 months last year and can put a lot of hurt on you if things need to get paid.  Things were able to work out because of the  Lords help and a family that wants to help.  When dad found out he got after me for not coming for help.  "Don't deny us blessing" was what he told me.  Well we asked for help and they were able to help and get the blessing for helping.  We are grateful for the help that they gave us.  So while I did not have a job we got thinking that there we could go to Weber State and since it is in Ogden that I would have a good change of finding a job.  It got to the point that if I did not find a job by Christmas break we would transfer to  Weber for the spring semester that started in January.  I got a job and we stayed for the spring semester at USU.  But now I am down in Perry getting ready to start the Fall semester at Weber State.
I still need to say how school went.  Good.  bluey gets after me for saying one or two word answers to questions that are asked.  Now the move from Logan.  We were looking in Ogden for places to stay and we asked blueys dad if he would help us look at places and see if they were good or not.  He said that we should wait.  We did and about a month later we were told by her dad that one of the apartments in Perry is going to open up and that if we wanted to we could take it.  It is going to be bigger than the one we used to live in and for about the same price.  We are going to be able to move in on July 1stish and we are looking forward to it. 
The new job.  It is with DFCM and I had worked for them when I just got out of High School down in Salt Lake.  After I left them I did not want to work for them again.  That was before I got the job with Converges and realizing that mowing lawns and taking care of grounds was not as bad as getting yelled at for really dumb reasons.  I really hated working for Converges and DFCM is not too bad.  I am working 4 10s which means I work from Mon-Thrus from 6:00-4:30.  Makes for long days but I am busy for most of the time.  We cover all of the state buildings from Framington to Logan.  So there can be some good driving involved.  It has been going good and the pay is not too bad.
Well that is all I am going to write for now but there is more I could write about later.  "Be Strong and Report Good Success"

May the Fourth be with you!

This post is just because of the day.  Hope you are all have a great Star Wars Day!



























And this is because I am love many things and think this is a great picture.